1.23.2013

Alt = Jealous!

As many of you know, Alt blogging summit started today in Salt Lake City! I could not be more jealous. As much as I wanted to be there to meet all of my blogging friends and learn from so many talented bloggers, I just couldn't leave my little guy yet (plus the tickets sold out in an hour!!). I also have a little 4 year old that requires lots of extra attention these days, I think she may be experiencing a little jealousy herself.

Any tips on how to deal with the jealous older sibling? I'm all ears.




14 comments:

  1. Time! We have a 2.5 year old and just had a baby in October... It took us about 3 months to get to a place where I think she has forgotten what it was like before her little brother came! Also, I try to spend special alone time with her, even if its just a trip to the grocery store or mailbox, we make it special! It gets easier! ;) Congratulations!!

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  2. I agree with Lindey...one-on-one time with just your daughter. My oldest had a hard time with having his new brother around but it helped when we spent time with just him. Also having her "help" with the baby may get her to enjoy this transition a bit more. Looks like she's lovin' him! So cute:)

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  3. I don't have any tips, but man, your kiddos are adorable!

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  4. I feel the exact same way! ALT 2014! By the way, I love your blog, your style, and congratulations on your new addition!

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  5. Special alone time with your cute daughter is key. Even if it's during one of your son's naps. Re affirming her spot in the family and that she is special to her mom and dad help too!

    Finally I am sure she would love to help you out and be a big sister!

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  6. I have a 3.5 yr old daughter and new baby boy in October. My daughter was head over heals for her new brother but I was on her "s" list! Anytime I nursed him, she would have major melt downs for my attention. One thing that really helped us, is that now when I nurse him, I tell her a special story that only happens during that time. It is called Thumbalina (a fairy princess) and I use my thumb to tell her the story of the special fairies. She totally eats it up! And it gave us a great bonding time during bonding with my son. She looks forward to this time now. maybe that can help?-It will get better!-Caprice

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  7. It's funny!! We all romanticize about the quintessential family life, siblings loving and doting on one another, but the reality is sooo much different!! I think that is why I had such a giant gap of 12 years, and yet, surprisingly, my 7 year old and 19 year old still go head to head with each other, not so much fighting for my attention, but my oldest chasises the youngest and then expects me to step in and discipline him for his reactions!! It's amusing to watch.

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  8. I'm with you....really wish I was going. Perhaps next year.

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  9. My parents had my youngest sister when I was 7 and my sister was 6. I think one thing that helped us the most was being able to be involved as much as possible with caring for her. Talking about how much attention a baby needs vs how independent she is at 4 years old and letting her help with whatever you trust her with (handing you clothes/diapers for changing, helping with baths etc. can be key--just making her feel like an involved grown-up can help! (And, of course, simple alone time as many have suggested).

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  10. My little guy loved when he got to help. Things like picking out her outfit for the day or washing her feet at bathtime. One on one time was also important but mainly I found trying to involve him as much as possible helped a lot. Letting him sit with us and reading a story on the couch while nursing was something he loved. We also got him a present from the baby when he came to meet her and kept telling him how much the baby loved him. I think it was hard for him to dislike her when he thought she loved him and looked up to him so much.

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  12. I don't have kids yet but I liked this article I read a while back so this came to mind when you asked about older siblings adjusting to baby. :-)

    http://www.drlaurablog.com/2012/07/11/how-to-help-your-older-child-adjust-to-the-new-baby/

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  13. Congratulations on the arrival of your baby boy!
    My children are 8 (daughter) and 5 (son) and we still struggle with jealousy - (I remember that first year being extra-tough, though -major heartstrings being pulled!)
    Now, we try to remember the "jealousy factor" when our kids act out (often they don't act out at the point of the emotion - sometimes it will be later!)
    I try to do as much as I can to promote positive rela. w/ family members and friends who take a special interest in my kids and make them feel really special - they lighten the load for me and the extra attention gives my kids tons of confidence!
    When we are reading a book or they are playing with a toy someone close to them gave them, I tell them the story about how someone special gave it to them - I think that helps them feel loved anytime - not just when they receive a visit.
    (I've also found the actual time does not need to be long or complicated with "activities"...the "just being together, no distractions for a short period of time really does work!)
    Best wishes to you and your lovely family!

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  14. My children are only 18 months apart, but when my second was born there were a few things we did that seemed to help. One was to read story books about new siblings so she could identify with the characters, another was to get her really excited about all the things she could do since she wasn't the "baby" - i.e. eat popcorn, stay up later, ride her bike, special mommy & daughter dates without the baby, and of course having her be "mommy's helper". Another thing we didn't do but I have heard helps is to give your older sibling gifts from the baby - new markers & a coloring book, or other sentiments. Or you can also get your daughter a mini boppy, cradle and other things like that for her baby doll so she can feel included while you nurse. As a mom to an infant you really do have to be with your newborn so much of the time - so as much as other people that your daughter loves (family members/friends) can come over and give your daughter special attention or taker her out for fun activities the better. I remember missing my daughter so much when my son was born because I didn't get the time with her that I was used to getting. It really made me appreciate her. You have adorable kiddos! Good luck!

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